It’s not a fantastic end to a promising challenge. I got nowhere close to achieving the goals I set out for myself. 

I have friends and coworkers participating in health and fitness challenges who have made significant progress with their weight and well-being. I know I shouldn’t be comparing myself to them, but I look at the scale and scope of my challenge and I can’t help but draw parallels: I really don’t have as much weight to lose or more ground to cover when it comes to regular exercise. I feel I’m better shape than my competitors–but by golly, it’s so much harder when one gets closer to their goals.

As I suspected, my diet continues to undermine my progress. I slip up way too often, giving myself permission to consume foods and snacks that hinder me. The sugar fiend haunts me on a regular basis; my tastebuds daydream of sugary desserts (blast you carrot cake) and it is so hard to break away from this addiction.

My expectations of course are also out of alignment; I’m still desirous of the quick fix–winning the sprint–when I’m really running a marathon. The new pullup bands I ordered has maybe seen activity only once a week since I purchased them. And the 100 pushups a day–there was always some excuse not to do them daily. I even bought a new 25lb kettlebell, but after a few workouts to failure, the DOMS kept me sidelined until I promptly forgot about them.

I really wanted to get more barbell lifting done, but the lack of space and a squat rack really limited me from doing it regularly. What a string of excuses I’ve come up with.

A few weeks ago, I got sucked back into PC gaming, which set me back onto a pattern of too much sitting and not enough sleeping (along with unhealthy snacking and less exercise). I can feel it so much more plainly nowadays when I didn’t get enough rest/recharge time.  

Some things have gone right, however. 

• I’m tracking my vitals more regularly 
• I’ve been walking about 8000+ average steps a day
• I taken the dogs out for walks nearly every day
• I’ve also been regularly taking my BP pills
• I participate in workplace fitness challenges
• I pre-cook most of my meals on the weekends
• I spent more time outdoors lately (even with the warmer weather)
• I am more “aware” of how I physically feel

I realize that stressful situations at work and home lowered my willpower. I have to regain control of these things so that I don’t self-sabotage myself. 

Reflecting upon the past challenge I noticed how some experiments rubber-banded: snapping back to the starting point every time I stretched. It’s as if the idea of a ceiling is causing me to under-perform. I have read that smaller goals are achievable than large ones; but maybe those are too easy because I bore easily. 

With the long summer looming ahead, I’ve been toying with the idea of getting back into the gym setting, except that I’ve already started investing in my own home gym–it would be silly to throw that money away. 

There are a few sure bets (goals) that I do want to achieve, to want, to have right now:

• A stronger, more muscular top half
• Continue to belt out 8000+ steps a day

 Things on my wishlist that continue to confound me:

 Dropping 20lbs and getting lean

• Seeing my abs (and getting lean)
• Sticking to a meal plan consistently (not cave to temptation so much)
• Doing 100 pushups a day
• Doing unassisted chinups/pullups

This is late in the writing, but I have to apologize. I strayed off course and got derailed several times in the past week. Inactivity and poor food decisions have led to a backpedaling on my health goals, particularly my weight. And this has made me angry and sad all at once; self-sabotage is an all-too frequent evil nasty associate when we attempt challenging makeovers.

I keep harkening back to last year when I reached a milestone, hitting a goal weight of 135lbs. All I do now is replay that glory in my head, thinking I can make it back there–no sweat.

But the reality is that it took some doing, it took effort and not some fly-by-the-seat planning. I didn’t just leave it up to fate and whim to decide my daily exercise and meal plans; I made sure to map out my actions, mentally prepare myself, and stick to my goals. The fact that I had an objective (Xmas party dress) helped shape my plans and decisions, even though I didn’t actually succeed. I got farther than I’d ever have, and that in itself was an accomplishment.

I’m in a rotten mood; a coworker publicly announced that he would help me achieve a pull-up by my b-day–in 3 days time. I am NOT thrilled that he said that in front of some other folks who had no business knowing when my b-day would be–and it is of course a sore reminder of how much this first quarter of the year has not gone according to my wishes.

I got a pedometer last week. I purchased some pull-up straps yesterday. I have no excuses about the weather lately–it’s been beautiful outside. All I lack now is the willpower to stay on course. 

• 30 minutes exercise daily
• 100 push ups a day
• 10000 steps 
• walk the dogs 

I have to remind myself this is not about dredging up the willpower to do these things; it’s about transforming them into lifelong habits that have tangible benefits.

I got my glucose/ketone meter in the mail last week (free from Abbott Labs) but I was sad to see that there were NO ketone strips included with the meter. I will have to scour the net for a cheap way to source these ketone strips. However, my lack of progress on the diet front probably means I won’t be able to take full advantage of them until I can stabilize my carb intake.

I gorged on Saturday, ingesting over 2000+ calories, including 3 cobs of corn that didn’t sit well with me. My body is still trying to right itself after that feast–I generally don’t get rid of grain carbs very easily, and my progress on the scale showed this. My morning glucose yesterday was also higher than usual…and my lack of real exercise or sleep probably did not help any. 

I joined a “Shape Up” team at work to keep me extra accountable. Turns out the company I work for is sponsoring a Global Wellness challenge and is sending all of its members a wellness package which includes a free pedometer to get people started. My coworkers and I will be participating to see if we can walk a total of 2500+ miles in 8 weeks.

An expense I am looking to make involves my new weightlifting hobby. It’s been a terrible time trying to lift anything more than a 44lb bar over my head just do a squat–although it makes for a great all-body challenge. However, my space prohibits me from investing in a full power rack–which most of the net consensus seems to agree is the best investment. It appears I will have to go the upgrade route and purchase a stand with the most upgradeability until such a time as my man and I get a new house.

However at $365 + SH, this is still not easy money to come by. But I am doing my research, looking at reviews and price shopping; checking eBay and Craigslist regularly for any great deals. I am also in the market for fractional plates since I am unable to make those 20lb jumps with my current set of bumpers.

Serious foot cramp yesterday trying to squat a bar…I could have sworn I warmed up sufficiently but it didn’t stop cramping up at the 10th set.  So maybe it’s time to wear shoes!

Until next week! 

Glancing at my first week progress, MFP’s reporting tool showed that I was above my carb ceiling 2 out of 7 days–not a great number starting out. As much as I would have preferred to stay under that 50g mark, it was a challenging task just to stay under 100g. Further investigation reveals that my liquid carbs are skewing my total carb consumption–the decision is clear, I’m going to have to “slim” down my coffee in the mornings. Luckily, I’m about to finish my bottle of Monin coconut syrup!

My occasional fruit indulgence also breaks my carb bank–who knew bananas had such a high carb/sugar content? 

Another problem that I seem consistent with is the net calorie overage. I’m about 675 net calories over goal. My weekend didn’t help this number, since the rain and cold kept me indoors–plus a cheat day at the movie theater on Saturday. However, since most of my weekly exercise consists of weight training, the resulting calorie burn isn’t really captured in my MFP logs. I’m fairly certain I haven’t burned 600+ calories lifting weights all week though.

My weigh-in this morning was not representative of what I was expecting; a shortened sleep schedule (about 6 hours) caused by all-day gaming on Sunday affected the number I hoped to see. I have a  feeling my glucose reading later in the day might also not be as good a number as I would like. I’m also dreading taking a picture–I imagine I will still look as swollen as I did on day 1.

I did sign up on www.choosefreestyle.com to get a Precision Xtra ketone meter, thanks to LivinLaVidaLowCarb.com who steered me toward the site. However, the challenge now is trying to get ketone strips to work with the meter. I may actually have to pay my doctor a visit to see if I can get her to prescribe the strips and get insurance to cover some of it. Ebay sells the strips anywhere from $3-7 a strip–expensive as heck! 

Another plus this week: I finally bought Sworkit Pro–and I love this app! 

I discovered a liking for low-cal white cheddar cheese wedges (from Laughing Cow and Lucerne) this week–making for a yummy and filling snack. I know most paleo diets eschew dairy, but I find that the fattening flavor of cheese keeps my hunger in check. Between the cheese or the bananas, I’m keeping the cheese.

Stay tuned next week–I hope to stick to my calorie and carb goals. 

60 days from today will be June 1st. I’ve issued a personal challenge to myself and friend/family to get off the slacker merry-go-round and start the journey to fat/weight loss.

Today, I threw down the gauntlet and said “20lbs or bust”! The plan: eating 50g carbs or less daily for the next 60 days.  According to the Primal Blueprint at MarksDailyApple.com, this is the magic number to ensure “effortless weight loss”.

I certainly achieved results late last year when I subscribed to this plan–which kept me on track even through the holiday season.

Since I’ve converted my diet to mostly an 80/20 Paleo plan, I’ve been experiencing a renewed physical vigor and mental clarity. I can definitely feel the negatives when I diverge from this eating plan–experiencing everything from fatigue and depression to high blood pressure and stress. Sadly, I had to endure much of the drawbacks of falling off the wagon in the first 3 months of this year–but no more! I’m fed up with feeling crappy!

A friend of mine started earlier this year on a Whole30-style eating plan and has achieved great success. He experienced many of the signs of metabolic syndrome and after several visits with doctors and specialists, he finally turned his diet around. He dropped 3 pants sizes and recently had to shop for new clothes.

My man also had to make a shopping trip earlier this month when he dropped 2 pants sizes and 1x shirt size! I was sooo happy for him–but he still has a way to go! He doesn’t want to give up the carbs–especially being on diabetic meds…but I don’t see him dropping the extra weight going the route he’s going (he loves his cereal, oatmeal and sandwiches). Still he is up for the challenge.

Another experiment I am looking forward to conducting is entering a ketogenic state. According to DietDoctor.com:

• Around 1.5 – 3 mmol/L is what’s called optimal ketosis and is recommended for maximum weight loss

Since my cabinets are full of glucose meters, I think I’ll be taking those measurements along with progress pictures to keep me motivated.

I’ve already set a calendar reminder to keep me on track for the next 60 days; plus, making arrangements with my fiance to hold us both accountable. 135lbs was the lowest I could go before the end of 2013…I’m hoping to push the envelope to 130 by the time June rolls around. Plus build up some muscle by including more weight training in my regimen.

See you in 60 days!